Well, fate stepped in and changed things. Obviously, I live a different life now, a life that has taught me to stop and appreciate little things.
I've really been pondering those little things lately. Every single day I see a miracle or two, in the form of a little boy defying a deadly disease. Every day he does something that amazes me: he eats all of his food (a serious miracle in itself), or he will move in a way I didn't think he was capable of. I joy in watching him trying to pat along with "Little Einsteins." The other day I was as proud as any mom watching a first step when I helped Dakin hold his arm up (while sitting up!!) and he fed himself a Pringle. I am amazed as I watch him discovering how to use the muscular ability he does have to manipulate objects. In the midst of complaining about Dakin developing a two-year-old attitude, I am secretly joying in it. And I get to see this stuff EVERY DAY. All things that, had he been a neurotypical child, I might have overlooked.
I am so grateful to him for teaching me the beauty of little things. I am so fortunate to get to be his mom.